Victory!!!!

That's right - after 4 hours and 50 minutes of walking, and surprisingly only one blister later, I finished my half marathon! Woohoo!!!

(I realize this isn't much detail. I'll add more later! I promise!)

The starting line!

This morning was the first coached run of the season. We met at the Alameda Ferry building, and started out with a shoe clinic before getting into the actual training. The information was useful, but for the most part it was stuff I already heard last year, so for me it was a basic refresher.

Once that was done, we listened to the honorees talk for a little while about how TNT and the Leukemia and Lymphoma Society have supported them with the funds we raise and also the emotional support the team members give honorees. We closed the morning info session with our usual team cheers, and then we split into the walk team and the run team to prep for the morning's workout.

Yesterday, I went to see my doctor to make sure that it was OK for me to start training again. My knee/IT band still isn't 100%, which continues to frustrate me. My doctor said right now, she was willing to allow me to train on the walk team but not on the run team. She also is going to try to get me authorization for more PT, which would be a very good thing.

So when we split into teams this morning, I went ahead and joined the walk team's warmup instead of the run team's. I was pretty bummed not to be running at least a little, but I reminded myself the reason I'm doing the walk training is to get to the finish line injury-free. There really is a lot of sense in me starting out on the walk team (and maybe even walking the half-marathon) to help strengthen my legs and knee back up. IT band injuries are rare for walkers, so chances are good I won't aggravate that more by doing the walk training, which is a huge plus.

We got started, and I realized as we were about 5 minutes into the 30-minute timed walk that I had forgotten to take off my sweat pants. Oops! I had my running shorts on underneath, and would have been MUCH cooler wearing those alone. Oh well!

I also remembered that the first 20 minutes is the hardest, and walking is no different from running in that respect. My legs felt stiff when we first started out, and that didn't start to change until I was about 20 minutes into it. Of course, the fact that I'm pretty out of shape and out of condition didn't help any either. My heart rate stayed at a relatively comfortable 145-148 bpm so it was clear I was working, but not overworking.

As I walked the course, I remembered back to last year. It was the week I had run my first mile, and I went from running one mile in track practice to running five miles in the following coached run at the Alameda Ferry. That was a triumphal week for sure, and it was bittersweet to be back on that course but walking it a year later. I reminded myself that I can always come back for future seasons and run that course again, and in better shape than I am now. That was a big encouragement.

One of the other huge differences between last year and this year was that after the first coached run last year, I was absolutely obliterated for the rest of the weekend. I was exhausted, slept almost the entire weekend, and I got sick. I was really afraid that would happen again this year, but it didn't. I came back from the workout and took a little nap (partially because I got up so early this morning), but now I feel fine. That's a really good sign that I worked myself hard, but not inappropriately hard.

All in all, I feel like I'm off to a good strong start that will lead to success in this half marathon as well as future ones. :)

Anticipation and anxiety

Kickoff's tomorrow. I think I mentioned that... um... yesterday. :D I've logged onto the team website and already started making connections with friends I knew from last summer's team. It's really wonderful to be welcomed back with wide open arms, but it's also made me wonder: how can I possibly live up to the example I set for myself last year?

This year, I'm going to be much busier (3 college classes plus working as many hours as I can), and I'm not starting off at 100% health. I'm not even sure I *can* run, or if I should. I'll be seeing my MD for a followup on my knee a week from today, and I'm hoping that she'll give me the green light, but what if she doesn't?

And then again, maybe this is just old fear and anxiety rearing its ugly head. I know that the majority of the people who choose to be involved in something like TNT do so because they have really wonderful, loving hearts. Those big-hearted people aren't going to judge me for my circumstances being different this year, right?

I made a promise to myself when Brenda passed away that I would train again this year in her honor and memory. I don't want to go back on that promise. I also know that I'm a lot more consistent in my exercise when I have a goal and team mates. Last summer worked really well for me, and I want to have that become a part of my life again. My life will always be busy; I'm just not the kind of person to have a few activities and lots of extra time to spare.

So if changed circumstances aren't going to keep me from doing this, what will?

Fear. Plain and simple. Fear that I won't do it "perfectly," whatever that means. Fear that I won't be able to do it at all, and will end up being the "waterstop goddess" for yet another season.

It's been said that "You can run, but you just can't hide" from your fears. Well, fears... watch me run!

Kickoff! The journey begins (again)...

Here I am... excited, nervous, anticipatory... The kickoff for TNT's summer season happens on Saturday and I'm really looking forward to seeing my teammates who are returning from last year, and the folks who are new that I haven't met yet.

I still need to check in with my doctor to make sure she doesn't have huge objections to me starting up training again, but I'm hoping that she'll be OK with it if I promise to train really, really, really easily.

My goal this season is to last the whole training season without reinjuring myself. This might seem kind of silly, but trust me, it'll make all the difference in the world. I have a tendency to push myself to (and beyond...) my limits, and the only way I will have a prayer of actually being able to run or walk the half marathon is to get through the season uninjured.

I'm going to do a solo recital this summer to raise funds, and I'm hoping it will be a good turnout for number of people and amounts of donations. We shall see! I'll do letters like I did last year, to let people know that I'm restarting my training and what happened last year.

Oh, and did I mention that I'm going to be doing all of this while taking 10 units of college courses and working full time??? It's going to be an interesting summer...

Physical therapy progress

I had a great session with my physical therapist today! Ever since I started, my physical therapist has been having me do "wall sits," and every time I've done them my knees have popped and crunched like pop corn or Rice Krispies. Today we figured out that reason it sounds so horrible is because I was putting my weight on the wrong part of my foot.... The good news is that once that was corrected, bye bye crunchies!

One more step towards being able to train again, for myself, for Brenda, and for all my other honorees.

Sad news

Do you remember Brenda? She's one of the honorees of the East Bay run team, and I got to know her last summer when I was training. When I first started out, her AML was in remission, but as the season progressed, we found out that she had relapsed. She went through chemo, and a bone marrow transplant in September. Unfortunately, the bone marrow transplant didn't go as well as hoped, because her new immune system began to attack her lungs.

I found out on Wednesday that she had been taken to the hospital and the doctors had taken her off her medication, giving her at most a day and a half to live. They underestimated her (her nickname wasn't "freakishly strong" for nothing!), but unfortunately this was one battle she couldn't win. She passed away at about 5 PM this evening.

She will be missed.

She's baaaaaack!!!

That's right, folks! She's back and ready to train! Well... almost. :)

I've been doing a LOT of work with my physical therapist in the last couple of months. I'm finally able to go up and down stairs without any pain, to walk comfortably without favoring my left side, and I don't need anti-inflammatories any more! Woohoo!!!

Best of all, my physical therapist has given me the OK to begin my pre-training routine (a combination of bike, elliptical and very short bursts of running) to get ready for the training season which begins at the end of May.

So I've sent in my registration and am officially part of the TNT East Bay (Bay Side) Run Team, training for the Nike Women's Half Marathon on October 21. I decided to go with the Bay Side team because I wanted to train with Coach Al and Mama Lisa again. What can I say??? I got spoiled last summer. And I chose the Nike for a couple of reasons.... 1) It was the one I was going to run last year, and couldn't, 2) Who wouldn't want to run a half marathon to get a free Tiffany necklace ;D and 3) October 21st is somewhat of a bittersweet anniversary for me so I want to commemorate it in a positive way. If you want to know more about that, shoot me an email.

Also, I have another honoree to add to my list. Her name is Keira Grace Bowman and you can learn about her and her family at http://keirabo.blogspot.com. She has neuroblastoma, not a form of blood cancer, but she's the daughter of some of my best friends in the whole world, and I hope that by raising funds for the Leukemia and Lymphoma Society there will be research done that will also benefit her and other kids like her. If you have a free minute, please stop by her blog and send her family a note of encouragement.

See you on the track!